Renee Falls Down
August 24, 2005 11:07PM (MYT)

Mami is such a failure, a mother of two and I still can’t take good care of both my precious. Two days ago Reeve fell down from the bed and last night at 11 plus pm, you fell down also from mami’s bed and hit the cupboard. You bled quite a bit because it had hit the corner of the eyebrow. We were all so scared, babee and I carried you to the nearest 24 hours clinic to clean up the wound. We went to Brickfields, all were closed, headed to Bangsar, none was open, then straight to Taman Desa, but everything was just not opened! By then it had stop bleeding, so babee examine you again and said it’s just a small tear. T h a n k G o d…

We reached home, as there was no more Dettol in the house, babee used Listerine mix with water and dap it on to your wound to clean it up, then applied antiseptic cream and bandaged you properly (during times like these, babee will always know what to do...he is such a McGuyver).
All this time, ah-mi darling was crying and yaya was so worried that it may leave you a scar. I just could not talk…I feel so, so, so guilty…even right yup till now as I am writing.

I was changing you in to pajamas and was about to carry you down to ah-mi’ room to sleep when I asked you give babee a good night kiss and you crossed both legs, lost balance and slipped from the bed with no support. Oh my god…I just should not have…

I did not cry, but I have such bad heartaches. You were still so talkative in the car, you told babee that you just came back from dinner with Aunty Yuri and Otosan. You danced, drank green tea and ate green tea ice cream…it soothes my heart to hear that you still remember recent happenings. You ask ah-mi why she was crying and answered yourself is it because Renee tung-tung ah? I showed you to the mirror, you “eeewww” and said “mami next time I don’t want naughty already ok”…baby it is not you, it was mami who was negligent, I did not ensure your safety. These periods are babies crucial months, just pray that you and Reeve will cruise through these few years safely and soundly...

Thank You - God again, that you are ALL RIGHT now.

I AM SORRY…